May 2004

GUIDELINES FOR HELPING CHILDREN COPE WITH DISCLOSURE ABOUT PRISONER ABUSE AND RETALIATION TOWARDS AMERICANS

The recent disclosure in the media about the military’s abuse toward Iraqi prisoners of war and subsequent retaliation by the beheading of an American citizen raises anxiety, fears and uncertainty about the future. Children may be especially vulnerable due to their cognitive development and limited life experiences.

No matter how frightening some feelings are it is more frightening if no one addresses them. If adults are silent, the children who depend on them may experience the added fear that we are not able to take care of them.

Adults are in a position to create an atmosphere of security, stability and support, which will provide a cushion against the full impact of this disturbing news.   Thus, it is important that adults first acknowledge their own feelings and find suitable ways to lessen their own anxiety. Remember, these reactions are a normal response to extraordinary events.  People have different ways of coping and need to do what is best for them. Identify your individual ways of coping: increase knowledge, connect with others, engage in nurturing activities, and honor your spirituality.

To assist children, adults can:

• Recognize the impact of media (TV, radio, internet, newspaper) on children. Provide an opportunity for children to discuss what they have seen or read.
• Clarify information in order to dispel misconceptions.  The child’s understanding of the event will vary according to each child’s developmental stage.   Adults should take their cues from children and respond to the information they express.  Giving children too much information is not necessary and can enhance their anxiety.  In your explanation clarify that this situation is an isolated incident and that steps are being taken to bring those accused to trial.
• Limit children’s exposure to media to lessen its impact.  Watching horrific scenes repeatedly can cause children to think that the events are ongoing.  It is a good idea for adults to limit their own exposure to this media as well because repeated viewing can be traumatizing. 
• Talk with children about their feelings and validate their reactions.
• Maintain structure and normal routine.  At a time when the world appears chaotic, children find comfort in “business as usual” in their homes and schools.
• Increase communication between home and school.
• Foster family recreational activities as a physical and emotional outlet.